Godly Gals ~ Mary Jo Hess

And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. And I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. Ezekiel 36:26 (ESV)

I remember being very emotional as a child. I had a soft heart. Little House On the Prairie made me cry. Commercials made me cry. Hurting people made me cry. Yeah. I had a soft heart.

But time has changed me. I know it isn’t time itself, necessarily. But circumstances throughout my life have changed me. I’ve become a very hard person – a heart of stone I suppose. Yuck. I hate even thinking about it. But it’s true.

I know there’s still some softness in there – because it creeps out every once in a while, when I let my guard down. And when it does, I hate it. I have turned into this person who equates crying with weakness – being a sissy – someone who can’t handle pressure – a softy. I’ve always looked down on that sort of thing (sorry to those of you who are like that – it’s just been my thought process these last 10 years).

The Lord has been revealing to me lately that He wants to finish the job. He wants to take away my heart of stone and make it a heart of flesh. He has shown me that not only does the heart of stone keep feelings out; it also keeps me from feeling Him. I have been keeping Him blocked out.

And all the while I couldn’t figure out why I never “felt” anything when God would move. I would get so jealous, so frustrated at anyone who could feel Him and I couldn’t. I knew He was in the room. I sensed His Spirit flowing all around me.

And yet nothing.

Is this going to be the end all to my ‘fixing?” Nope. I’ll be a work in progress until Jesus comes to get me. But I know this is a major thing He is going to do in me. And it will take time. And you know what?

I’m scared.

But I’m excited.

I know in order to soften my heart, He’s going have to break the stony one. And it’s going to hurt. I know there will be tears. I know emotions will flow – emotions that I don’t like dealing with – but in order to “feel” I’m going to have to “feel.” Does that make sense?

So I guess it’s time to work it all out. If you happen to see me in the grocery aisle and I’m crying over noodles, don’t worry. I’m not upset with the noodles.

He’s just making a new heart in me.

I can’t wait to see the results.

A Little Bit About Mary:
Mary is a wife, a mom, an employee, a business owner, musician, and worshipper…but none of that compares to the fact that she is madly in love with Jesus and that she’s a daughter of the most High. Her blog, Mary Hess ~ Melodies of a Heart Surrendered to the Unforced Rhythms of Grace is a place to find out more about her family and her heart.