I just got off the phone with one of my friends and had to laugh at how God has been teaching both of us the same lesson in this season of our lives. We talked quickly for just a short bit, trying to play catch up from the last time we spoke on the phone. You know, the “there’s been a whole lot I have to catch you up on” talk, but this was coming from both of us, so we ran through our stories telling bits & pieces from our lives over the last month or so just so the other person would still feel “in the loop” of our friendship.
At the end of our mini marathon conversation she said the words that have been on my heart for the last couple of weeks. She said, God is really teaching me that I am NOT in control here.
Aha! There it is. The very thing (the exact sentence to be quite honest) that He has laid on my heart as well…I am NOT in control here.
We laughed, probably to keep from crying, at the fact that even though our friendship has taken a back seat to the busyness of life right now that God would keep us connected in so many other ways. She had to jump off the phone and get to work, but the dizziness of the 2×4 had hit me again. It was like God was trying to say it to me “one more time“…I am NOT in control here.
I wanted to take a few minutes to unpack just what control really is, so I went over to my good friends at Dictionary.com and here’s what I found. Control is;
1. to exercise restraint or direction over; dominate; command.
2. to hold in check; curb:
6. the act or power of controlling; regulation; domination or command: Who’s in control here?
Did you catch the little part in italics at the end of the last sentence?
It’s as if God is sending me a giant neon billboard that says, “Melissa, dear sweet Melissa, why, oh why are you always so hard-headed. You are not in control here, and never have been. Slow down. Step back. Let me take the lead. Take it easy, I’m in control.”
If you’ve been around Mel’s World for the last couple of months you will no doubt see that there has been a lot of things going on, in, and around my family and ministry. And in true type A perfectionists style I (key word) keep trying to pick up the baton and run with it, while all along He’s been trying to tell me to release control & let Him run with it.
Dear Heavenly Father, thank you so much that you love us even when we are hard headed and stubborn. Father we’re trying to take control of life when we are supposed to be obedient and follow. Help us to be better followers. Your grace is amazing and we are so thankful that you give it so freely. Help us when we try to pick it back up again. Help us remember that we are not in control. Give us peace in the midst of laying it down and giving it back to you. In your son’s precious and holy name, Amen.